@teenpuke: do you qualify to be my crush? *pulls out list* *checks off has a beating heart* yup you qualify
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@vanluvz1: I love the gym this time of year. The newbies make me look like a Victoria Secret model.
@LoveYoorFate: When your coworker tells you they are getting a divorce a high five is not the right answer. Or so I've been told. Twice now.
@ohpeetie: You think you understand people and then you see a car with eyelashes on the headlights.