@ecareyo: Do you think Jesus described his hair color as light blonde or summer wheat?
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@k_lli: A guy was honking at a car ahead of him to speed up at 6AM so I followed him bc his job must be amazing if he's that excited to get to work.
@SlabBaconBP: Take a stand against childhood obesity by chasing little fat kids down the street.
@cbdoubleu: Her: I like risk takers Me:[goes to the McDonalds Drive Thru and places a complicated order. Grabs the bag and drives off w/o checking it]
@squidswards: Teachers are sometimes like an alarm clock. They won't shut up when you're trying to sleep.