@Karate_Horse: do you think my parents divorced because I'm too handsome like they said
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@chrizmillr: Weird how Superman's an alien but looks exactly like a white dude & then he landed in Kansas & not say, mainland China
@thestlouisan: Wife just said "burgs" instead of "burgers" and now I'm a little scared to think of what she's going to do with all the time she saved.
@online_rat: sorrey im bad with names. im also bad with faces,, i put my grandma in a headlock, thinking she was the kid that stole my bike in 3rd grade
@RxitWounds: Is this your 1st video conference call? *Takes HUGE bong rip* *Holding it in* umm no So you're aware we can see you? *Cough* what *cough*