@pleatedjeans: [doc pulls baby out of mom and immediately slides it under his shirt] oh no NOW I'M PREGNANT haha no [pulls it out] just kidding here you go
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@shariv67: It puts the lotion in the basket. Then it calls the wife to make sure it's the right brand so it doesn't get the hose again.
@ScottFilmCritic: If you only see one raccoon getting a marriage proposal today, make it this one.
@thenatewolf: Me: my doctor says if I get annoyed I could die You: so you can't watch that YouTube link? Me: I'm saying it's dangerous to even send them