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@_GPL_: Doctor: How's your headache?
Patient: She's out of town.
@GabbbarSingh: If only Lord Ram used Apple maps to reach Ayodhya, Beijing would have been celebrating Diwali today.
@megankcomedy: I experimented a ton in college. I tried naps in the evening, naps in the morning, sometimes even 3 naps in a row.
@VinnyPisciotta1: Singin' in the Rain is a beloved Oscar-winning classic, but singin' on the train will get you harsh stares and a six seater all to yourself.
@cheeky__gal: I think my cats hate people as much as I do.
Every time the doorbell rings, they hide under the bed with me.
@1Tortured_soul: Fun fact: The average Canadian swallows eight moose per year in their sleep.