@AndyRichter: Doctor in lab coat peers into microscope. "Good Lord!" he says. "His burrito levels are off the charts!" - from my autopsy
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@pharmasean: Beethoven: hey everybody, this next song’s called "Für Elise” Elise: omg, we broke up 6 months ago, get over urslf B: SHUT UP ELISE I LUV U
@Reverend_Scott: [kisses daughter goodnight] Sleep tight. "Daddy, where do babies come from?" Um, the Stork. [stork knocks on bedroom window] He's lying.