@daemonic3: Doctor told me I only have 6 months to live, maybe 12 if I get enough likes on Facebook.
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@LuckoftheDraw86: I'm gonna date the first guy to come out of this "Free STD Screenings!" van. #goodplan
@Dwarven_Cleric: Darth Vader: "Listen Luke, this is a new arrangement for both of us. Let's not force things. Just let me know if you need a hand."
@Contwixt: Why go through the trouble of becoming an astronaut when you could just put a plastic bag over your head and roll down a hill in a freezer?
@ch000ch: the first guy to ride a horse was all like GIDDYUP HORSEY and the horse was all like DAMMIT WHO TOLD HIM THAT MAKES US GO