@UNTRESOR: Doctors just told me I have "stripper lung" from inhaling too much brass polish & if I go back to "JIGGLERS" again I'll die.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Nickadoo: The fact that Mitt Romney opted to see Twilight instead of Lincoln this weekend probably sums up what his presidency would've been like.
@FunnyMojoJojo: I went to bed last night and my brother came out of the closet and scared the shit out of me, I forgot we were playing hide and seek...
@illuminatedwndr: the guy at Subway just put Cheetos on my sandwich. can't tell if he's stoned, or he knows that I am
@AndPlayDad: I don't know what the big deal is. Putting my toddler to bed is easy... In fact, just tonight, I did it 25 times.