@Breadery: Dodgeball but with random people that don't know they're playing.
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@aimlessamers: I pledged to pick up 10 pieces of trash on Tuesday. So, I'm going to Walmart to see if anyone needs a ride. *adds humanitarian to resume
@ksej: "Having sex for money is bad because it is counterfeiting feelings" wow dude, I have bad news about every other customer service job ever
@SomthinBoutSara: I'm gonna pretend my dad didn't abandon me but is actually on the missing Malaysia air flight and he'll be back