@3sunzzz: Dodgeball in gym class...
because life wasn't already hard enough when I was 12.
@blamingboredom: Seals are just dog mermaids.
@EZ_G: Every woman has an inbox. She carries it with her just in case she gets male.
@dafloydsta: [job interview]
"Tell me one of your long term goals"
"No, I meant-"
*leans in way too close* My answer isn't going to change
@spotswoj: Well, she was raised to refer to dinner as 'supper' so obviously it wasn't going to work out in the end.
@samuelhlowe: -Do you take drugs?
-Ever tried them?
-You seem very nervous.
-I'm just not used to being questioned by a unicorn.