@wilw: Dog: I like pizza. Me: You've never had pizza. Dog: It's food. Me: So? Dog: So I like it. Me: I'm not giving you my pizza.
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@Camel_Crushin: Genesis is my favorite rock group who've been around long enough to write a chapter in the bible.
@Spaziotwat: There are eleven types of people in the world: those that understand Roman numerals, and those that don't
@Home_Halfway: The proper way to make a Caesar salad is to repeatedly stab it with dozens of other people in a Senate building.
@rudy_mustang: [applying for a job at the FBI] FBI: and there will be a video interview Me: do i just walk up to any computer with a webcam lol FBI: Me: FBI: you could do that, yes