@jonnysun: DOG: [looking out the window] wat a beautiful mornimg! the sky is grey, the grass is grey, the birds are grey and readey to eat,
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@living_marble: Technically, it's only cannibalism if you eat the top half of the mermaid, your honour.
@FloodyHippie: I support Greenpeace because I care about environmental activism, just not enough to do any of the real work myself.
@blairgarner: To apply for a job at Hooters do they hand you a bra and say, "Here, just fill this out." ?
@mynameisntdave: GUY: I dare you ME: no G: I double dog dare you ME: no G: I TRIPLE dog dare you! ME: [realizing if I keep this up ill get a lot of dogs] no