@LostInMyWorld97: Dog tried taking me for a run. I wasn't having it. I made her drag me the whole time.
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@JH_Moncrieff: "I don't understand...we're a grocery store. Do we really need an editor on staff?" Yes. Yes, you do.
@Vodkantots: Grilled cheese is just regular cheese that's been forced to account for its whereabouts last night between 9:30 and 11.
@Nursey2Be: Women are like bacon: we look good, we smell good, we taste good and we will slowly kill you.
@_sweet_ham: Sometimes I put my workout gear on and watch tv because it's the thought that counts.