@PeaceInTruth1: Dogs have a tendency to bark just to hear themselves bark. Reminds me of some people I know.
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@LoveNLunchmeat: Serious question... Would Titanic have been more romantic if they had both died, but holding hands and floating, like otters?
@ShutUpThatsWho: [son falls over & hurts himself] ME: aww poor kid, he needs a little THC WIFE: don't you mean TLC? ME: [huge bong rip] he needs what now?
@genepompa: Can't believe my dog just ran into Petco and left me in the car with the windows rolled up