@Contwixt: Don't act like you've never used a pair of binoculars to try to peer through another pair of binoculars.
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@TennisShoeBoi: On my last flight I watched a woman in front of me pull out her hair and eat it until I fell asleep. Can't do that in first class.
@mrtruthandsoul: *breaks out of prison *hunted by police for weeks *crawls thru 22 miles of mud to your house* Me: <taps on your window> DID YOU GET MY TEXT?
@cbdoubleu: Not to brag, but I have the high score on 7 different blood pressure machines around the city. *enters initials
@samalmightysam: - Hey babe, do you like how I did my makeup? - Yes and if you want I can go and kill Batman with you.