@Chase_Observes: Don’t believe in aliens, huh? Explain how people in the 1800s got on top of those bicycles with the huge front wheels.
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@MakesYouGiggle: Interviewer: Why did you apply for this job? Me: Because being broke and homeless didn't really call out to me.
@rickolantern: Me: I found this in the fridge with your name on it. Are you gonna eat it? CW: That's my stapler Me: You didn't answer my question
@TheToddWilliams: Galileo Galilei (1564-1642) played a major role in the scientific revolution even though he was such a poor boy and nobody loved him.
@KidBeatnix: If you want to play frisbee Buy a frozen pizza instead of a frisbee And when you get hungry from playing frisbee Eat your frisbee