@Chase_Observes: Don’t believe in aliens, huh? Explain how people in the 1800s got on top of those bicycles with the huge front wheels.
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@shadygrenade: License and registration please. "Bears." Excuse me? "Beaaaaars." Are you drunk sir? "BEAAAARS!" Stop saying bea- *cop is mauled by bears*
@causticbob: I walked a girl home last night, and things got a little awkward at one point. She turned around and found out I was walking her home.
@SoWeirditsCool: Stalker status update: Good news-I'm not in your house. The bad news-I am UNDER your house and the tunnel is complete.