@Chase_Observes: Don’t believe in aliens, huh? Explain how people in the 1800s got on top of those bicycles with the huge front wheels.
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@PinkCamoTO: I'm so glad I had a kid so instead of relaxing in the bath, I can have someone explain Minecraft to me in painful detail.
@nerdreign: Courtney Love thinks she found the plane. It's like God doesn't trust us to write our own jokes.
@The_MartiniGirl: Pretty sure I just did some classical ballet move as I got off the computer chair to get to the kitchen and saw a spider on my floor.