@BatBatshitcrazy: Don't bite the hand that feeds you, unless of course, they're feeding you kale.
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@badbanana: I'll be celebrating my birthday the traditional way, by barging naked into a room full of strangers and crying.
@WheelTod: I wonder if Eric Clapton really thought she looked Wonderful or was it just the 20th outfit she'd tried & he just wanted to get to the party
@jake_likes_naps: [in hospital] son: what happened dad me: bar fight son: over what? me: he said... *clenches fists* he said Zelda is a boy
@The_JRM: There's a woman here who, by the amount of makeup on her face, fought with a rainbow - and lost.