@TheTalkingPipe: Don't care what your religious or political beliefs are, if you're male or female, young or old. I will tackle you hard for that last donut.
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@sweetandweak: Daughter just told me, "Dad, I don't make sandwiches, I eat sandwiches." One day her picture will be on money.
@angibangie: The last time my heart beat this fast I was at my boyfriend's parent's house and the toilet water was rising... -My best pickup line
@kyry5: At a business meeting: "How about SuperCupid?" "No, expectations will be too high" "GreatCupid?" "Lower" "Uhhh, OKCupid?" "Brilliant"