@Dawn_M_: Don't date men who will hold open a door for you. Date men who will punch a squirrel in the face for chittering it's teeth at you.
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@Hypercraxy: I have a bumper sticker that says "Honk if you think I'm sexy." Then I just wait at green lights until I feel better about myself.
@Reverend_Scott: wife: um, why is the zoo calling about a missing baby tiger? me filling a big bowl with frosted flakes: no idea.