@Tmoney68: Don't tell me I don't know the difference between right & wrong. Wrong is the fun one.
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@briangaar: Sorry babe, you knew you were dating a bad boy [shuffles Pokemon cards without the plastic covers]
@stockejock: I'm white, but not cage free range eggs in my quinoa-kale quiche for my gluten, lactose, and peanut free Sunday brunch white.
@juliussharpe: My earthquake kit is just a tuxedo because in case of a disaster, I want to look like the most important person to save.
@DumbConfessions: Had sex in a kiddie pool full of jam once. *pops jean jacket collar* I got marmalaid.