@Smooheed: "Don't worry my love, I'll breathe for the both of us" I whisper as I drink directly from the wine bottle
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@_Ms_Moneypenny_: Friend: Can I borrow a pen? Me: Sure! *looks in purse* *pulls out perfume, 17 Hershey kisses, a stapler & a baby goat* Me: Sorry, no pen. :(
@RobotThomas: Roses are black Violets are black It's late at night I didn't pay the electric bill.
@iGreenMonk: I'm the kind of friend who will help you hide a dead body, but if you betray me, just remember: I know how to hide a dead body.
@JediGigi: Me: Has anyone ever told you that you look like Ryan Gosling? Him: Me? No, but thank- Me: Ok just making sure.