@Julian_Deane: Double whammy. First date is turning out to be fun & I also go to meet my hero Chris Hansen from Catch a Predator.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@msbtx: "Snitches get stitches," I whisper to my 3 year old as he watches me brush Oreo crumbs from the bed sheets.
@WritePlay: Wife: I can't find my phone Me: Want me to call it? Wife: Sure, I - Me: PHONE, HERE BOY
@Reverend_Scott: [job interview] What's ur greatest strength? "I wear too much cologne" No, I mean- "A lady legit passed out when I got in the elevator"
@david8hughes: "911? Help, my house is burning down!" "Sir, we're sending the fire brigade right now." "I HAVE ENOUGH FIRE I DON'T NEED A BRIGADE OF IT."