@DrDogMD: DR DOG: *applying a cast to a broken bone* Are you sure you don't just want me to cut it off?
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@TheMichaelRock: Boss: Anyone have anything else to add to this meeting? Me: Yes. I am awesome. Boss.... Me: Write that shit down.
@juliussharpe: Parachuting is probably the best way to put your life in the hands of a backpack.
@jdforshort: If sexual frustration could be transferred into a usable energy source, I would be sitting on a gold mine
@TheAlexNevil: What I Say To 7: "This is just between us" What 7 Hears: "Tell Mom everything and please embellish it to make it sound 100 times worse"