@lazerdoov: Dr. says I have an enlarged heart thanks doc I already know I'm super nice just trying to figure out why I can't breathe when I eat chips
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@UncleBob56: What is it Lassie? Timmy fell down a well? Earthquake in LA? The Russians are coming? You found a plane? No? ...Oh, you want another beer.
@SatansTongue: Give me a massage "Mm okay" *rubs oil all over her* *things get hot* *things get too hot* *she bursts into flames* "Dang I used petroleum"
@RxitWounds: Permission to use your hammer, your honor It's a gavel Permission to use your gavel Denied *looks longingly at pile of walnuts & sighs*