@1Bad_Scientist: Draw me like one of your French Fries.
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@LuckoftheDraw86: Either I just stepped in dog shit or the stench of my parent's disappointment has started following me around.
@Darlainky: Nice try little pine tree air freshener, but this gas station restroom needs the efforts of an entire forest.
@TrueTorontoGirl: Dave: I don't want to sound stupid.... Me: Then stop right there and say nothing.
@Dschnoeb: Someone who blocked me on Twitter just added me on Instagram. If you can't love me at my bad jokes, you don't deserve me at my cat photos.