@Robert_Beau: Drink responsibly? Responsibility is why I drink.
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@ImaFlyontheWall: Receptionist: So you're here about your carpal tunnel huh..fill out these 20 forms and press hard so the copies are clear
@SondraDeeMe: I date men whom have their life paths laid out firmly and don't waver. Yes, their paths are Psycho and Socio, but consistency is admirable.
@ShaneKnowsStuff: People hear my southern accent and automatically assume I'm stupid. Let me tell you something right now. That is just a coincidence.
@kumailn: "I bet all those murders are done by that hooded guy whose always running around rooftops w 17 weapons on him."-Nobody in Assassin's Creed