@kwirkyKerri: Drops empty vodka bottles in all the neighbor's recycling bins. So the garbage men don't think it's just me.
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@thatdutchperson: "You're not pretty enough. Now pay us $3.99 so we can tell you why." - Magazines
@DanMentos: "So what do you do?" I'm a wordsmith "A what?" A writer. I deal with words. How about you? "Oh I'm a uh… weedsmith"
@TheToddWilliams: Daddy, where do bananas come from? Well son, when a manana and a womanana really love each other...