@iSmokeJoints: Drug dealers are always late. If your drug dealer is on time, it's the police.
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@dafloydsta: BOSS: We need to improve morale ME: Okay BOSS: How about an office party? ME: [crosses out "replace coworkers with puppies"] I guess
@TheRolo: FBI: "Report anything that seems suspicious" Citizens: "Jet fuel can't melt steel beams" FBI: "K like not anything anything"