@TeaPartyCat: Duck Dynasty guy is right-- if we baptize all those ISIS guys, Iraq will be safe because Christians never start wars for bullshit reasons.
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@Wakenbake77: If you find a fry on the floor and you don't share it with me, we can't be friends. Don't touch me. Monster.
@moose_chocolate: I will selflessly protect my family from a life of diabetes by eating the entire box of donuts.
@PortRooster: If women had to be assembled, a lot of us would probably just play with the box...
@tnylgn: The person that was in charge of naming Ohio must have thought of it when they realized someone was waving at the person behind them.