@lovemyboots111: Duct tape can't fix stupidity, but it can muffle it.
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@mooses_mom_mar: Wanted: Someone to do the Locomotion with me. ~No weirdos
@OctopusCaveman: Next time you hand someone a roll of toilet paper under the stall, hold their hand for a while. Let them know it's gonna be okay.
@StarWarsProblms: Vader: Remove my helmet so I can see you with my own eyes. Luke: OK. Vader: On second thought, don't. I have 30 years worth of hat hair.
@TheToddWilliams: [gun shop] ME: Does this gun come with a nuclear warhead? CLERK: Haha no that's illegal ME: Ok CLERK: You can buy the warhead separately
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