@lovemyboots111: Duct tape can't fix stupidity, but it can muffle it.
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@DurtMcHurtt: I love giving a little kid the tongue, and then watching him run to his mother holding the severed tongue I just gave him.
@howe007: If Russia prepares for war the way it prepares for the Olympics then we have nothing to worry about.
@Tommytoughstuff: "DOUG YOU'RE THE NEXT CONTESTANT ON THE PRICE IS RIGHT!" [camera pans to me struggling with Doug for his name tag]