@NervousJr: Dude, I can't tweet AND know when the light turns green.
I'm pretty, not magical.
@inmybox07: Whoever designated mini cupcakes as "two-bite" has greatly underestimated my #cupcake eating abilities.
@KatMcSnatch: My ex sent me a text saying "please delete my number..."
I sent one back saying "who's this?"
@raydevito: My four year old niece summarizing her day at Safety School "Look both ways or you die"
@pbear79: If you have a gluten allergy I feel bad for you son.
I got 99 pizzas and you can't eat one.
@Sadieisonfire: A good game for if you're staying in tonight