@shkeeber: Dude, why did you buy Grand Theft Auto 5? I mean, honestly, you live in Detroit. You could've just gone outside and saved yourself $50.
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@wickedsuga: DON'T TOUCH ME! AND YOU'RE BREATHING WRONG! STOP IT! -wives, on their period Or if they're hungry. Or if you are actually breathing wrong.
@HeyZeus666: My dad use to take me to the circus to see the tattooed man and the bearded lady. Now, I can see them anytime shopping at Walmart.
@Bagyants: My gangster name would be The Street. If someone dared to oppose me I'd say ominous things like "Look both ways before you cross The Street"
@stephenjmolloy: Doctor: "I have never seen this before: You have no bones!" Me: "Really? Could the x-ray be broken?" Doctor: "Ignore what I just said."