@Peachyisk: Due to recent cutbacks the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off.
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@SteveSuckington: [first date] Her: omg are you wearing a cape? Lol Me: [texting mom] ok you were right about the cape
@T_Bonezzz_: I like to put a few lawnmowers in the back of my truck and follow landscapers all day just to make them nervous
@iAmDelFreaky: In elementary I got all the chicks because my box of crayons had a built-in sharpener. Been on a dry spell ever since. Just me & my crayons.