@GrantTanaka: During the bank robbery, I was the one who heroically soiled himself & cried in order to incapacitate the robbers with laughter
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@DaddyJew: Interviewer: what's your biggest weakness? Me: im very straight forward I: doesn't sound like a weakness M: you look stupid in that tie
@CarolineCasey: Sorry I had to cancel for the 5th time in a row, I thought you would stop inviting me by now.
@otterwrangler: Please stop giving your dogs human names. My sons Buster & Lucky are getting pretty sensitive about this!