@Usetobeabastard: Dust bunnies are great pets because they thrive on neglect.
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@supertweetjen: The guy two cubes down wears vests, curls his mustache, and never says a word. I always smile politely because maybe he'll spare my life.
@Diversion50: "Get Well Soon" is a lovely thing to write on a card for someone whose home is without a water supply.