@ericsshadow: Earth is huge. There must be like 9 or 10 different countries on this thing.
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@sssh_squirrel: I'm going to just start biting the faces of people that stand too close during a conversation.
@envydatropic: My neighbors just got new wind chimes. Guess who is going to have their wind chimes stolen tonight?
@daemonic3: ME: I got us a custom headstone! WIFE: I'm not being immortalized in one of your dumb jokes ME: Just read it WIFE: "Tomb it may concern…"