@TheTweetOfGod: Earth was the first world I created. It has all kinds of problems. #firstworldproblems
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@cervixsmash: Mobile tweeting with 3% battery is a lot like the band playing while the titanic sank
@JermHimselfish: In spite of what you might have heard, some pretty magical things happen behind dirty dumpsters in shady alleys.
@suz1973luq: Text exchange: me- we need eggs. hub- how many? Me- One. See if they will sell you just one.
@ComedicBust: *Blind Date* Her: Ask me anything.. Me: Do you know how to properly layer nachos? Her: Are you seri.. Me: *flips table*