@TheTweetOfGod: Earth was the first world I created. It has all kinds of problems. #firstworldproblems
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@notacroc: [restaurant] ME: *reading menu* how's the chicken parm? OUR WAITER, TONY THE TIGER: it's grr- MANAGER: *glares at Tony* TONY: it's exquisite
@7_Cents: United States: There's 5280 feet in one mile. Rest of the World: What even is that? United States: Lol, we made it up.
@Green_EyedMama: You're how old? *does quick math in head* Ok! I'm not old enough to be your mom ...lets do this! -justifying a bad decision with math