@CheetoBandito77: Eating a solid brick of Ramen is probably the easiest way to remember I need to pay the water bill.
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@OfficeofSteve: Moving is a lot more fun when you make the Movers carry you on top of the mattress like an Egyptian pharaoh
@brittwastaken: *walks seductively up to table* *licks lips* Me: Come on baby. Just one more time. Him: Lady, I'm not giving you any more cheese samples.
@outsidemagazine: Yellowstone visitor upset bears didn’t show (Would like park service to train them):