@AaKesseli: Eating just one animal cracker is impossible. The entire herd must go.
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@scarebro: My girlfriend broke up with me because she and I had different opinions. My opinion was that I was worth dating.
@TheDairylandDon: No rule against wearing an old Halloween costume to Thanksgiving. Let your racist uncle talk presidential politics with Donkey from Shrek.
@chrissyteigen: I just realized that when I murder someone my neighbors will never describe me as "quiet"