@sixfootcandy: Those Weren’t Raisinets: A Mouse Tale

@naazihah: The Very Hungry Caterpillar taught me that I can binge eat carbs and then take a two week nap and I'll become beautiful.

@murrman5: I got fired today "what? why?" no idea "you have no idea?" nope "I'm confused when did this happen?" between pre break break and break

@robyn_vo: Just saw a woman, covered in red paint, running and screaming from an abandoned country house, LOL good prank.

@JennyJohnsonHi5: Watching my mom use an iPhone is like watching a 12 year old girl try and contact her dead grandma on a Ouija board.