@robdelaney: Enrages me when I see guys using cute dogs to pick up chicks. It's like, why did I have kids.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@KelFocker: I was sad because I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet. So I said, "Got any shoes you're not using?"
@djdarrellripley: Me: Don't tell me you've never thought about having sex with me. Her: No, I never have.... Me: I asked you not to tell me that.
@LorieGZ: Mom: I called you bc I was watching a TV show & thought of you! Me: Ya? What show? My Mom (laughing): A show about Aliens! Very funny Mom!
@ShakespearePop: I just made your acquaintance, and this is preposterous, but here is my address, perhaps thou shall mail me maybe.