@kumailn: Even the name "OK Cupid" sounds like you're telling love to, like, settle down.
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@Quartzjixler: I requested the number 867-5309 from my cellular provider because I like being annoyed to the point of rage.
@dulcetry: Rapture's tomorrow. Christians will be flying up into the air to meet Jesus. Two words: DUCK HUNT
@topaz_kell: When I treat people the way I want to be treated, they get weirded out when I start brushing their hair.
@bIessbaby: *gets abducted by aliens* thank you. you have no idea how much i hated living on that planet