@Gowitty: Evening News is where they begin with 'Good Evening' and then proceed to tell you why it isn't.
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@_Water_Baby: Some choices are easier than others: An emergency doctor's appt vs a much needed hair appt. At least if I die my hair will be cute.
@davidgrossTV: ME: I'll have the burger. WAITER: And how do you like your burger? ME: I don't know. You haven't brought it to me yet.
@therealeatwood: ME: Stop hemming and hawing DONKEY TAILOR: [with quiet dignity] Sir, you may take your business elsewhere
@Molly_Kats: If you call & I don't answer, I'm not dead, I'm napping. - Things I have to say to my mom