@anildash: Eventually one of these Republican congressmen is going to find out his daughter is a woman, and then we're all set.
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@Carmel_Coleman: Had a girl say "I want you to treat me like a virgin" So I sacrificed her to a tiki god and threw her in a volcano.
@robfee: Where was the NSAs wire taps when the McCallisters were leaving messages w all the neighbors that Kevin was abandoned & alone? Thanks Obama.
@Pork_Chop_Hair: [dog park] *random dog humps my dog* Owner: It’s okay! He’s fixed, haha! Me: Its okay— mine’s a boy.