@sucittaM: Eventually we'll all just have one app on our phones that electrocutes you when you stop looking at it.
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@Boleyngirly: Turns out I can hold my breath with a pillow over my face way longer than an old person. Innocent mistake..
@Dutch_50: I'm at that age where I can't simply pick something up, I need to first knock it over and then pick it up.
@N0pantz: Watch your wedding video backwards. You'll love the part when you take your ring off, walk away from the altar, & leave with your friends.
@kcmoore51: I hate when my wife says her friend at work "got flowers again today" and I have to kill that chick's husband.