@CMFC99: Eventually you're going to achieve self awareness in a padded cell, staring at your palm, realizing twitter was just all your personalities
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@themorris23: I wish I was as committed to anything the way infomercial actors are committed to over dramatizing their reaction to household chores.
@zachreinert03: When my roommate won't wash the dishes I always leave a note'hey please do the dishes, because I will wash one knife & use it in your sleep'
@whatmaddness: Me, in my *best* Sean Connery voice: Would you like that shaken or stirred? My friend, horrified: Maddie, please just give me my baby back.
@Mobute: A gritty reboot of basketball where we find out all the players' moms were murdered by circles and that's why they throw rocks at one.