@Not_James_Vogel: Ever find buried treasure in your grandpas backyard containing passports, Nazi uniforms, and a photo with Papa with the Fuhrer inside? Yeah.
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@Cheeseboy22: Picking up this tiny piece of paper would take 1 second, but instead I am going to run over 100 times with the vacuum at different angles.
@MikeDrucker: Yelp is a fun game where you try to guess between whether a restaurant is bad or a reviewer is crazy.
@GavinProbably: Facebook- You: Going to a concert tonight! Friend: Sweet, what concert? Aunt: WHAT IS ITUNEZ?????? HOW IS YOUR DAD????? I LOVE YOU XOXOXO
@_wangwe: Judge: Did you commit murder? Me: I'm a man. I'm afraid of commitment. Judge: hahaha! Me: hahaha! Judge: Life.