@HollyHeals: Ever have the shower curtain touch you unexpectedly and start karate chopping the air?? No, me either.
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@recoveringbapti: Be on the lookout for a armed psychic midget who just robbed a bank and got away....the police now have a SMALL MEDIUM at LARGE!! ba dum dum
@moxieblogger: Dear God, Laying an egg once a month would have been preferable. Thanks for nothing. ~ All women
@AGreaterMonster: I'm going to swallow a jack-in-the-box so that when they do an autopsy—BOING, surprise!