@_shellzbellzzz_: Ever look at your frequently used emojis and realize that your two moods are drunk and circus tents?
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@salamingia: My wife said I'm picky. I said obviously not picky enough. Anyone need a roommate tonight?
@Kyle_Lippert: Go to Starbucks. Tell them your name is Dad. Hide in the crowd. Listen as the hipster barista says "Dad?..Dad?..DAD?..DAD?!" & starts crying