@FadeAway2: Ever notice when you need to delete a phone app and you get the icons jiggling? They seem all panicky about who's getting cut from the team
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@shariv67: The only French I know are words for food items and the chorus of Lady Marmelade. Turns out that's all you really need.
@daemonic3: [shark tank] "Hi, what's your product idea?" Product? [holding bucket of live fish] I'm here to see the tank of sh-... I've made a mistake
@_mindflakes: Me: Siri how much moss is it safe to eat Siri: I wasn't built for this Me: Siri, the moss Siri: Please let me go back to the phone factory
@MarfSalvador: Boss: I expect total transparency from my staff Trevor: That's not always practic— John the Jellyfish: NO PROBLEM BOSS